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Posts tagged “hatred

The Battle of The Bathroom: Political Correctness Run Amok

Recently I got into a… not really an argument or debate but just a small thing with someone on social media regarding whether or not transgender folks should be able to use the bathroom they choose, rather than the one dictated by their anatomy. My position is that they should use the one dictated by their anatomy, simply because it has become too much of a grey area and a line has to be drawn or a distinction made somewhere. It’s going to have to be there. That’s the simplest and most obvious resolution to the problem, and for me it is a problem. Not because people are trans, though. I have a problem with the whole transgender bathroom thing because for someone to feel uncomfortable if an opposite sex person is in the bathroom with them would be a pretty common thing. Most people don’t want that. If nobody cared, that would be something totally different. But they do care, so why do 500 people have to be made uncomfortable just so one person is not? I’m all for equality as everybody knows, but that isn’t equality – at all. It’s special rules for special people, which is the antithesis of equality.

If someone can say, “My rights are being violated by forcing me to use the bathroom for my anatomic gender because I don’t personally feel that gender is correct. I feel I’m in the wrong bathroom which makes me uncomfortable,” why is it not OK for someone to say, “My rights are being violated by forcing me to use the bathroom with someone who is not anatomically the same gender as myself even if they think that gender is incorrect. I feel they are in the wrong bathroom which makes me uncomfortable”? Isn’t it the same thing?

Transgender person: “I am uncomfortable using the bathroom around people I feel are the opposite gender from myself, even if they don’t think they are.” The narrative says OK. You don’t have to. This is a big deal and we will do everything we can to ensure you are not uncomfortable.

Non-transgender person: “I am uncomfortable using the bathroom around people I feel are the opposite gender from myself, even if they don’t think they are.” The narrative says You’re a bigot. Suck it up. It’s not a big deal and if you say it is, you’re just overreacting. 

How is that fair? It’s the exact same thing. This is where it bothers me. For me, it’s not a transgender issue. It’s the unfairness of the narrative. The person I got into the thing with asked the folks in the thread, “And what do you actually think they’re going to be doing with thier [sic] penises in the bathroom? Chase you around and say “ooga-booga”? Rape you?” That right there is bullshit. It’s stating that if someone is uncomfortable by having to use the bathroom with someone they feel is the opposite gender, they’re being needlessly fearful and overreacting. That translates into: Your feelings about this don’t matter. Yes, it affects you personally but they still don’t matter. Your privacy doesn’t matter. Nothing matters, except how this one person feels. She went on quite a bit about how it was no big deal and people who had a problem with it are just overreacting. If that’s the case and it’s no big deal to use the bathroom around people who you feel are the opposite gender, why can’t our hypothetical transgender friend just use the bathroom dictated by their anatomy? Oh, right. Because it is a big deal – for them. The hypocrisy of that argument just absolutely astounds me. It really does. “I’m doing the same thing you are, but you doing it is bigoted.” What the hell, man? I’m hateful and bigoted for saying the same thing you’re saying? I’m hateful and bigoted because I don’t want to go to the bathroom with people of the opposite gender – the exact same thing transgender folks don’t want? Why? Why is it OK for them to feel that way but not for me?

It isn’t just with this issue, of course. This issue is just a perfect example of the hypocrisy and absurdity of political correctness run amok. In an attempt to appease the few, the many are sacrificed. This in the end appeases nobody. It breeds anger and creates a feeling of being marginalized and disrespected. Of course, it’s supposed to. Divide and conquer and all that.

As an aside, I find it amazing that so many people claim to be against “rape culture” and state ridiculous things like, “The penis is by default an object of violence” but somehow are able to reconcile the penis as inoffensive and impotent (sorry) when the bearer of said penis believes he is a female, and further, that they insist that girls and women who don’t want a person who is anatomically male in their bathroom need to simply put up with it.


The Tamir Rice Shooting & Why You Picked The Wrong Martyr

The shooting of 12 year old Tamir Rice in Ohio is discussed.


Damaged. But Is It An Excuse?

As I have said in other posts on this blog, the world is becoming overrun with narcissists and sociopaths. These empty vessels are frighteningly easy to create and impossible to deconstruct. It is not their fault they are this way; they do not become such empty vessels by accident. It is almost always the result of childhood abuse, neglect or other repetitive childhood trauma. The question that then comes to mind is, “Are they to blame for their behavior?” After all, they are victims. At what point do they stop being victims and become perpetrators? Do they ever stop being victims?

These broken people walking around cannot help what they are. They cannot help the way they see the world, or the fact that they can only view other people as objects. They cannot help the fact that they are incapable of love or empathy. They were utterly failed in a very real, very sad way by whoever raised them. They are fundamentally broken, flawed and empty beings. It is not even precisely right to call them human beings; the internal landscape of the narcissist and the sociopath is barren. Alien. It is obvious to many people. Many who come in contact with these vacant containers feel right away that something is off or wrong about them. And it is. They walk around mirroring and pretending for their entire lives, trying to mimic normal, integrated human behavior and listening to an incessant, sadistic and vicious superego that tells them how disgusting, awful and terrible they are 24 hours a day. The pressure of this is crushing. The stress is unrelenting and there is no escape from it. So are they to blame for doing things that give them relief from this torment?

Yes. They absolutely are.

Narcissists and sociopaths know that what they are doing is wrong. Maybe not morally, maybe not personally but they know that this is not how normal people behave because society does not condone or approve of it. If they thought it was OK, they would not conceal their behavior or go to such lengths to ensure that people never find out who and what they really are. Because of this, they can and should be held responsible for their behavior and their actions. Hiding or excusing what they’ve done only permits them to continue to wreak havoc, destroy lives and hurt people. Hold them up to the light. Bring their behavior out where people can see it. They are afraid of being exposed and it is your only hope of stopping them.


Watch Out, Your Bias is Showing

It is a shame when people cannot see past their own hatred and bias. I posted a picture of Jesus on Facebook with a story attached that gave reasons why things the person thought were bad (losing car keys) were actually good (kept him from being in an accident). I stated that even if you don’t believe in God, the sentiment of the story was wonderful because we should always remember that things we think are bad could be – and often are – a blessing in disguise.

Someone commented that they thought the story was terrifying because people who believe God is controlling their lives are “mentally deranged.” No matter how many times this person was told that the point of the post had nothing to do with God or religion but rather, had to do with the fact that many negatives often turn out to be positives with the fullness of time, he could not seem to understand and continued to rant about religion and the craziness of people who have faith. It was as if this person was having a completely different conversation from the rest of us.

It was funny at first but then it became sad and actually scary that someone could be so blinded by hatred like that. I’ve never seen anything like it. That’s saying a lot because I have lived and worked with people who have mental illness and developmental disorders for over 10 years and I have absolutely never had such a hard time explaining to someone that they’ve misunderstood. No, I gotta say: I’ve never seen anything like that.

If the mere mention of the word “God” – or any word, for that matter – can make you that blind, you need to examine yourself and your motives, because if you cannot look past your bias to see the bigger picture, you are the one with the handicap.

The blatant bias and hatred that were on display are really sad. When you cannot look past a fucking word or a concept to see the bigger picture, you are the one with the handicap. When you are having a conversation that is completely different from the one everyone else is having but cannot even see that, you are the one who looks mentally deranged. When you attack everything that is even tangentially related to the subject just because it’s sort of, kind of, a little related, you are the one who looks hateful. When you make blanket statements regarding everybody in a certain group, you are the one that looks intolerant. And when you are so carried away by your own self-righteous buffoonery that you cannot even see that you’ve misunderstood – let alone accept it – you are the one who looks stupid.